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Sunday 5 April 2009

Knickers to you!

B. (aged two and three-quarters) is head-over heels about knickers!

Yes, this is my third attempt at potty-training my daughter, and I'm hoping the current knicker festival is going to tip us over the edge into success.

We've got all sorts of knickers - blue, green, red, white, yellow and of course pink, pink, pink. Blue-and-pink ones, pinks-and-red ones, white-and-blue ones, pink-and-pink ones. There are dotted ones, spotted ones, striped ones and frilly ones. Knickers with butterflies, with flowers, with little bows, knickers with ice-creams and knickers with dinosaurs (no wait, those are AJ's).

And we are experimenting with getting them on and off, backwards, forwards, on our heads, arms and feet. Sometimes several pairs at once. We wear them with big woolly socks, with Thomas slippers, with blue wellies and sparkly pink wellies. And we are learning to drop them quickly and smoothly before settling on the potty (preferably). And pull them up at the close of business (preferably).

Teddy is wearing them. So is dolly. So is rabbit. And so are Action Man and Spider Man, on whom they look more like streaming Tuareg robes than undies. The toys take tea wearing them. They ride around in the dolly pram wearing them. Sometimes they even find their way to the car and thence to kindergarten (at least they're clean...ish) wearing them. And the favourite book of the assembled company of knicker-sporting cuddlies? Aliens Love Underpants, what else?

B delighted her audience of one yesterday with an impromptu ditty as follows :

"Knickers dirty on the floor,
Knickers dirty on the ... (looks around) ... wall
Knickers dirty ... (a long pause for inspiration) ... up the CHIMNEY!"

(And an armload of colourful cotton is flung into the air with all of a little girl's might in the general direction of the fireplace.)


Knickers have even been the cause of the latest B. disaster. Chasing her ever-patient (ha!) Mama around the kitchen, thwacking her with a pair of yellow butterfly 100% cottons, she tripped and caught her face on a bench. So many people have remarked on the shiner she's currently sporting 2cm from her eye that I'm expecting a visit from the Mama-police any minute now...

I'll try to be polite when they knock on the door, but while this household continues to be gripped in frillies-frenzy, whatever the social services have to say, the answer will always be...

..."knickers"!

9 comments:

♥ Braja said...

Louise, my lovely, I finally made it here to give you my loving thanks for your care and affection and messages of love sent over the weeks...we were both strengthened enormously by the outpourings of love and care from around the world, and I am so honored to know you and be on the receiving end of that from you...thank you.. xxx

Anonymous said...

Brilliant again. Just send the SS round to see me if you want. I have been known to turn into a savage dog.

Vanessa said...

Tee-hee. You can take the girl out of England but you can't take England out of the girl...England, where even the mere mention of knickers sends even the most sensible of people into paroxysms! Loved it.

Hit 40 said...

My best luck potty training came from buying them fun undies at the discount store like superman or batman. I would tell the kids not to pee on batman. Good luck!

Loren said...

I just love the word "knickers." Here we say "big girl pants" or "big boy pants." That doesn't really make sense, since they are not pants. I would so love to hear your little cherub singing the knickers song. I can imagine how cute it must be. Really enjoyed this post, Louise!

Brenda said...

My best potty training happened with out knickers, just a bare bottomed child running around the house. Eventually the potty ended up in the right place ;)

Anonymous said...

Lots of good advice here for you Louise.

Anonymous said...

Hilarious! Getting your knickers in a twist can be a lot of fun!

Louise | Italy said...

@Anonymous : I don't mind the social services, although I do think they failed horribly and tragically in the Baby P case recently (http://carminesuperiore.blogspot.com/2008/11/baby-p-rant.html). They're welcome here any day. Although they might find themselves showered with undies by a Terrible Two. Worse, a Terrible Twosome (because AJ just loves to get in on the act).

Sunday 5 April 2009

Knickers to you!

B. (aged two and three-quarters) is head-over heels about knickers!

Yes, this is my third attempt at potty-training my daughter, and I'm hoping the current knicker festival is going to tip us over the edge into success.

We've got all sorts of knickers - blue, green, red, white, yellow and of course pink, pink, pink. Blue-and-pink ones, pinks-and-red ones, white-and-blue ones, pink-and-pink ones. There are dotted ones, spotted ones, striped ones and frilly ones. Knickers with butterflies, with flowers, with little bows, knickers with ice-creams and knickers with dinosaurs (no wait, those are AJ's).

And we are experimenting with getting them on and off, backwards, forwards, on our heads, arms and feet. Sometimes several pairs at once. We wear them with big woolly socks, with Thomas slippers, with blue wellies and sparkly pink wellies. And we are learning to drop them quickly and smoothly before settling on the potty (preferably). And pull them up at the close of business (preferably).

Teddy is wearing them. So is dolly. So is rabbit. And so are Action Man and Spider Man, on whom they look more like streaming Tuareg robes than undies. The toys take tea wearing them. They ride around in the dolly pram wearing them. Sometimes they even find their way to the car and thence to kindergarten (at least they're clean...ish) wearing them. And the favourite book of the assembled company of knicker-sporting cuddlies? Aliens Love Underpants, what else?

B delighted her audience of one yesterday with an impromptu ditty as follows :

"Knickers dirty on the floor,
Knickers dirty on the ... (looks around) ... wall
Knickers dirty ... (a long pause for inspiration) ... up the CHIMNEY!"

(And an armload of colourful cotton is flung into the air with all of a little girl's might in the general direction of the fireplace.)


Knickers have even been the cause of the latest B. disaster. Chasing her ever-patient (ha!) Mama around the kitchen, thwacking her with a pair of yellow butterfly 100% cottons, she tripped and caught her face on a bench. So many people have remarked on the shiner she's currently sporting 2cm from her eye that I'm expecting a visit from the Mama-police any minute now...

I'll try to be polite when they knock on the door, but while this household continues to be gripped in frillies-frenzy, whatever the social services have to say, the answer will always be...

..."knickers"!

9 comments:

♥ Braja said...

Louise, my lovely, I finally made it here to give you my loving thanks for your care and affection and messages of love sent over the weeks...we were both strengthened enormously by the outpourings of love and care from around the world, and I am so honored to know you and be on the receiving end of that from you...thank you.. xxx

Anonymous said...

Brilliant again. Just send the SS round to see me if you want. I have been known to turn into a savage dog.

Vanessa said...

Tee-hee. You can take the girl out of England but you can't take England out of the girl...England, where even the mere mention of knickers sends even the most sensible of people into paroxysms! Loved it.

Hit 40 said...

My best luck potty training came from buying them fun undies at the discount store like superman or batman. I would tell the kids not to pee on batman. Good luck!

Loren said...

I just love the word "knickers." Here we say "big girl pants" or "big boy pants." That doesn't really make sense, since they are not pants. I would so love to hear your little cherub singing the knickers song. I can imagine how cute it must be. Really enjoyed this post, Louise!

Brenda said...

My best potty training happened with out knickers, just a bare bottomed child running around the house. Eventually the potty ended up in the right place ;)

Anonymous said...

Lots of good advice here for you Louise.

Anonymous said...

Hilarious! Getting your knickers in a twist can be a lot of fun!

Louise | Italy said...

@Anonymous : I don't mind the social services, although I do think they failed horribly and tragically in the Baby P case recently (http://carminesuperiore.blogspot.com/2008/11/baby-p-rant.html). They're welcome here any day. Although they might find themselves showered with undies by a Terrible Two. Worse, a Terrible Twosome (because AJ just loves to get in on the act).