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Wednesday 12 December 2007

A trout in the milk

Six degrees at 8:30am. Bright but blustery with white horses.

Consider this evidence : a bloody carcass surrounded by nine hens and one rather shaken cockerel all surrounded by a seemingly impregnable fortress.

Conclusion to which we jumped : the vicious chicks did away with their small companion in a fit of cannibalism.

Consider this evidence : a ruckus in the chicken coop and a bloody-beaked hawk leering over a dead chuck. Chase ensues during which chicken-keeper is viciously pecked by desperate hawk before it spies the open pollaio door and skims majestically away whooping with relief.

Conclusion to which we now must jump : it was thee 'awk wot dun it, me lud.

Hindsight research reveals that hawks are known to search for gaps in the wire, and unlike most birds, they are not scared of going into confined spaces (i.e. the coop) in pursuit of a chicken dinner for one. Shame we didn't know - the skies around Carmine are frequently visited by raptors of all sorts.

Palazzo Pollo has now been fortified - and the slingshot has been re-strung. We thought of hiring a young boy in a loincloth to act as chicken herd but decided he might get a bit parky sitting on a pile of wood aimlessly playing his flute all day.

Sorry to the girl who lost her life because we jumped to the wrong conclusion. At least she's now in the fridge awaiting cryogenic storage and we'll do our best to do justice to her when the time comes.

And sorry to the hens I previously likened to a bunch of over-educated British schoolgirls
. It was uncalled for.

As Henry David Thoreau wrote : "Some circumstantial evidence is very strong, as when you find a trout in the milk." But the lesson is that it's never strong enough to convict.



No comments:

Wednesday 12 December 2007

A trout in the milk

Six degrees at 8:30am. Bright but blustery with white horses.

Consider this evidence : a bloody carcass surrounded by nine hens and one rather shaken cockerel all surrounded by a seemingly impregnable fortress.

Conclusion to which we jumped : the vicious chicks did away with their small companion in a fit of cannibalism.

Consider this evidence : a ruckus in the chicken coop and a bloody-beaked hawk leering over a dead chuck. Chase ensues during which chicken-keeper is viciously pecked by desperate hawk before it spies the open pollaio door and skims majestically away whooping with relief.

Conclusion to which we now must jump : it was thee 'awk wot dun it, me lud.

Hindsight research reveals that hawks are known to search for gaps in the wire, and unlike most birds, they are not scared of going into confined spaces (i.e. the coop) in pursuit of a chicken dinner for one. Shame we didn't know - the skies around Carmine are frequently visited by raptors of all sorts.

Palazzo Pollo has now been fortified - and the slingshot has been re-strung. We thought of hiring a young boy in a loincloth to act as chicken herd but decided he might get a bit parky sitting on a pile of wood aimlessly playing his flute all day.

Sorry to the girl who lost her life because we jumped to the wrong conclusion. At least she's now in the fridge awaiting cryogenic storage and we'll do our best to do justice to her when the time comes.

And sorry to the hens I previously likened to a bunch of over-educated British schoolgirls
. It was uncalled for.

As Henry David Thoreau wrote : "Some circumstantial evidence is very strong, as when you find a trout in the milk." But the lesson is that it's never strong enough to convict.



No comments: